The 3 Most Important Life Questions
When I started my spiritual journey in earnest over 10 years ago, I enjoyed listening to motivational and spiritual teachers from Vishen Lakhiani’s MindVallley. Being able to see some of these incredible teachers live in Amsterdam this Summer was a long-awaited experience for me.
One of the teachings I found particularly impactful was Vishen’s talk on ‘The 3 Most Important Questions’, so I wanted to share it with you.
You may have noticed that I really enjoy goal setting 😊. My motivation and sense of direction in life come from choosing what I want to attain and taking action towards it. However, I’m aware that for some, traditional goal setting can feel limiting or even uninspiring.
Vishen explained that many of us are chasing means goals, the “how”, like getting a promotion, making a certain amount of money, or buying a house, instead of focusing on the “end goals,” which are about following our hearts - how we want to live our lives and how we want to feel.
“The problem with traditional goal-setting is that it’s about attaining things, rather than experiences. It’s about the ‘means’ to an end, rather than the end itself.” - Vishen
This is where his 3 Most Important Questions come in. They help us move beyond what society says we should want and instead give us clarity about the vision of the life we want to create.
The 3 Most Important Questions
In your notepad, journal or on a separate piece of paper, draw three equal columns.
The headings for each column are:
Column 1 - Experience
Column 2 - Growth
Column 3 - Contritubion
Read the questions below and write your answers in the relevant column.
1. What do I want to experience in life?
These are the things that light up our soul. They include our desires for love relationships, friendships, adventures and our environment.
Examples:
Travel to the 7 most sacred sites around the world
Play guitar and sing in front of an audience of 100 people
Practice yoga in Bali
Spend 6 months in an Ashram in India
Travel all over the world, teaching people how to follow their dreams
Having a strong, healthy body
Learn Italian in Florence, Italy
Take your family to see the Aurora Borealis in Norway
Write a best-selling book
Host retreats by the ocean
Create a spiritual community
Speak to 10,000 people about breathwork
Speak at a TED talk
Have 3 amazing passive income businesses
“Don’t ask ‘what do I want to do?’ Ask instead, ‘what experiences do I want to have in this lifetime?’” – Vishen
2. How do I want to grow?
This is about the person we are becoming. Think about the skills, knowledge and qualities you want to cultivate within yourself, including health and fitness, intellectual life, your skills and your spirituality. Consider what you would need to learn, know and understand to have the life experiences identified in question 1.
Examples:
Build confidence in public speaking by joining a speaking group
Learn guitar or take singing lessons to a high level
Have an extremely effective, focused mind
Learn about business and marketing
Become an authority in meditation
Take a book-writing course and write regularly
Immediately apply important learning points acquired from books or videos
Learn about health, fitness and nutrition
Master leadership and people skills to the point of becoming a trainer
“Your growth determines your capacity to serve. Who you become will create the life you dream of.” – Vishen
3. How do I want to contribute?
This is such an important question that often gets overlooked. Contribution gives meaning to our lives and turns our vision into something bigger than ourselves. It could include career, creativity, family or community
Once you’re living and growing, how do you want to give back to the world?
Examples:
Mentoring young people
Starting a podcast that inspires others
Leading community circles
Volunteering your skills for a cause close to your heart
Opening a free retreat centre for artists and writers to create
Sponsoring children from disadvantaged areas
Sharing meditation in local schools
“Fulfilment doesn’t come from what we get. It comes from what we give.” – Vishen
The beauty of this exercise is that there’s no timeline. Your vision may take ten years or more to unfold. What matters most is not the speed but the clarity. Once you can see your experiences, growth and contribution clearly, life has a way of aligning to bring them into being.
So take some quiet time this week, journal on these three questions and let your answers expand your vision. You might be surprised at what comes through when you dream without limits.
With love and light
Gwen x
